Exhaustion and Grief: Finding Support in Huntington Beach

Grief can be a confusing and isolating experience. Your emotions and experiences in grief might feel so alien and unusual that you might wonder if there is something wrong with you. Many people feel this way, and many need to have extra grace for themselves. Not only is grief confusing, but it is exhausting in many different ways. In this article, we’ll look at the interplay between exhaustion and grief.

Exhaustion and Grief: How They’re Related

Drained From the Inside

Exhaustion is a natural aspect of grief because it engages all the facets of who you are. Not only will you experience intense, conflicting emotions, but you will have to figure out many different practicalities that feel at odds with your emotional rollercoaster. Having to arrange finances or travel details while also processing your emotions is exhausting.

Many people need to hear that it’s okay to feel a certain way or to struggle with certain things while grieving. Exhaustion is just one aspect of grief, but it affects people in many different ways for different reasons. As you navigate grief, consider the ways that you might be feeling exhausted, and have some grace and patience for yourself.

Emotional Exhaustion

Some people do not consider themselves to be emotional people, but even they will be confronted with a wave of emotions in grief. Not only are these emotions powerful, but they are persistent. Grief doesn’t pass after a funeral or after a good therapy session. You might have to process a cocktail of conflicting emotions for months and even years while grieving.

One of the most difficult aspects of grief is that it offers no closure. People crave completion, wholeness, and neatness, but in grief, emotions are messy and unpredictable, and closure can be hard to find. You might have emotions that don’t blend well together, like anger and sadness or resentment and gratitude. The sheer weight of all these emotions and their unusual behaviors is exhausting, even for those who usually consider themselves level-headed.

Mental and Logistical Exhaustion

Life doesn’t spare you the space or time to grieve as needed. Many people feel numbed in grief but have to plan, organize, and think their way through things. Funerals need planning, guests need hosting, belongings and properties need to be dealt with, and in the midst of it all, you have to figure out what you are feeling and what to do with those feelings.

All the logistics and planning can be a helpful distraction, and the matter-of-fact aspect of organizing things helps you to accept reality and grieve as you should. However, it is also draining. If you don’t have friends and family members to help with these things, you will benefit from taking an hour each day to sit, breathe, and feel.

Spiritual Exhaustion

There is perhaps no other time in life where you will examine and question your beliefs quite like when you are grieving. People often feel like their foundations have been shaken or even crumbled in the aftermath of loss and tragedy, and it often feels like there is no definitive answer to your deepest questions.

If you do end up confiding in someone trustworthy about your doubts, anger, or fears, you might find their easy answer frustrating and unhelpful. No one mentions how spiritually exhausting grief can be, especially when it causes you to question your worldview.

In biblical times, people would often grieve together for weeks on end, and the cultural expression of prolonged grief was silence. Friends would meet with mourners, stay in their homes, and simply sit with them until they were ready to talk. This comforting silence is what most people need when grieving because sometimes all you need is the quiet comfort of a friend holding space with you.

Physical Exhaustion

If simple, everyday tasks are becoming more difficult to complete and you are always tired no matter how much sleep you are getting, it could be a sign that grief is taking a physical toll on you. We often think of grief as being a mental and emotional experience, but we also experience grief within our bodies. Grief is a physical experience as much as it is mental, emotional, and spiritual.

Grief Counseling in Huntington Beach

Grieving can also be a lonely experience. Sometimes, you just want to be with someone who “gets it.” It might help you to meet with a Christian counselor in Huntington Beach, California. Your counselor will give you space to be yourself and to leave your burdens at the door, even if only for an hour or so. Contact us at Huntington Beach Christian Counseling if counseling is something you would like to learn more about.

Photo:
“Frosted Stinging Nettles”, Courtesy of Stephan H., Unsplash.com, CC0 License

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