Traumas That Get Invalidated: Finding Faith-Based Support After a Traumatic Experience

There are many events a person can go through that might seem ordinary on the surface, but they can be a serious traumatic experience. Sadly, so many of these trauma-inducing experiences are so common that they have become accepted as “normal,” and you may feel like you shouldn’t be traumatized or even deeply affected by them.

When you begin looking into your history, you might find that one or more of these experiences impacted you in a traumatic way. Confronting your emotions connected to these events might help free you from shame.

Types of Invalidated Traumatic Experiences

These are common experiences that most of us have faced. Someone else might have had a similar experience without being traumatized, but that doesn’t mean you should feel ashamed for how you reacted. We can’t always avoid feeling traumatized by something, and it might take years to understand how deeply we were affected. You are not weak, strange, or melodramatic for having been traumatized by these things.

Losing a Job or Being Unemployed

Many jobs will sanitize their language when firing someone by telling them, “We’re letting you go.” That underscores what it feels like to be fired or out of work for any time: you feel worthless or like your value as a person has been rejected. Regardless of our attitude or experience with certain jobs, being unemployed or fired can be a truly traumatizing experience, fraught with fear, anxiety, and low self-esteem.

Poverty and Debt

Perhaps few realize just how traumatic unemployment, poverty, and debt are because they are so common. One of the most fundamental aspects of trauma is feeling like the world is an unsafe place. For those who don’t have the security of knowing how they are going to pay rent this month, let alone get out of crippling debt, the world feels like an unsafe place.

Overworking

To avoid falling into debt or poverty, many people are forced to work two or three jobs, often while being single parents. Though it might be the norm, working multiple shifts for little pay without rest is traumatizing. When you feel as though you are giving every ounce of your resources and who you are as a person simply to ensure that you don’t end up in worse living conditions, you are experiencing trauma.

Being a Victim of Bullying

Bullies come in all shapes and sizes, but perhaps the worst bullies are the ones with positional authority. We can deal with internet trolls by simply logging off, but when your bully is a boss, manager, teacher, or parent, you are often left with no other choice than to face the bullying and harden yourself.

Bullies tend to have a lot of unaddressed trauma in their lives, but rather than face it and begin dealing with it, they choose instead to criticize, blame, manipulate, and shame those around them, sometimes even their children.

Having Parents Who Fought Constantly

Some of us grew up in homes where conflict was commonplace. We might have heard our parents or family members say truly awful things to each other or use physical violence on each other. Regardless of how we reacted at the time, these experiences tend to stick with us for decades, affecting our view of others and impacting our ability for intimacy.

The End of a Friendship

Many people have experienced the pain of a breakup, but sometimes, it is the breakups we have with friends that impact us the most. Our friends are often a part of our lives for longer than our romantic partners, and we might find it easier to trust in and rely on them than anyone else in our lives. Losing a friendship, even through something like a disagreement or grave misunderstanding, can impact us deeply for years.

Losing a Pet

The passing of a beloved pet can seriously impact our mental health and emotional well-being. Some people might invalidate this trauma by claiming human life is more significant than an animal’s, but pets impact our lives on the same level as family members and friends. Losing a pet can be a genuinely traumatizing experience that can take a long time to get past.

Finding Healing After a Traumatic Experience

If you would like to find a safe place to begin talking about your traumatic experience, we can help. At Huntington Beach Christian Counseling, we can connect you to one of the highly qualified counselors in Huntington Beach who are ready to walk with you through your trauma. If you would like more information, please don’t hesitate to contact us by phone or email. You are not alone.