Emotions are Normal: Using Your Emotions as a Source of Strength

Emotions are normal, and yet they can cause deep pain and trouble in life. The knowledge and understanding of emotions have grown to a place where terms such as OCD, narcissistic, panic attacks, and trauma are commonplace, and depression and anxiety are known as everyday struggles.

Naturally, at such times, people want solutions to stop their emotions. Something else that happens is people strive to protect their emotions. Either extreme is based on a skewed view of emotions.

Let’s normalize having emotions again

Happiness, anger, sadness, fear, and all of the other feelings named after these basic emotions have something in common. They are a normal part of the human experience. To have emotions is to be human. The Bible readily demonstrates this. From Adam and Eve, we can see emotions play a part in their behavior. From happiness to fear we can see all of the emotions on display. We rejoice when things go well.

Many find themselves relating with David as he laments in the Psalms. Most can understand the anger displayed against those who did wrong. So much of the fear displayed can be just as relatable. Emotions are not only normal, but they also serve a purpose. In fact, more than one.

Emotions are a source of strength

Appropriate for this lifetime, before Jesus comes back, are all of our emotions. Each of the emotions plays a role in leaving us longing for an eternity with God.

Happiness gives us all the illusion of simply enjoying life on this earth. However, as everything good comes from God, we can know that once God removes Himself from the earth there will be no such thing as something to smile about. Happiness allows us to taste His goodness and long for more of it.

Anger is a great emotion to draw us closer to God and be heaven-minded. Anger, when it rises because of someone sinning, aligns us with God’s hate of sin. Sinning in our anger allows us to see ourselves as we are and know that we do not deserve heaven, thereby bringing us to cling to the good news of the gospel.

Fear of God, which can come from recognizing our sin and understanding our breaking of God’s law, is the beginning of wisdom and drives us to salvation. Fear of the consequences of sin that is not our own brings a longing for heaven.

Sadness brings a similar longing for heaven. Whether it is remorse or grief, experiencing this normal emotion brings a longing for heaven. Once we recognize God’s presence as the answer, our emotions appropriately all bring about a longing for heaven.

A time for everything

No emotion is abnormal, and each emotion is appropriate for its certain time on this side of heaven. I can’t speak for heaven itself, other than there will be no more tears or pain.

Anger is normal to feel when sin steals and destroys. A hatred for sin is normal. So is sinning in our anger. There’s no settling for the sin in either instance just because anger is normal.

Fear is normal to feel when sin is revealed. It drives us to seek safety and stray from danger. Even the brokenness of the fallen world can strike fear in us. Fear reveals our need for a savior.

Sadness is normal to feel when sin steals and destroys. Whether you have a broken and contrite heart over your sin and need to repent, or you have felt the devastating effects of sin by another, sadness is supposed to be felt.

Emotions cannot be erased

If you are human, you have emotions. They are an innate part of us and cannot be erased. In fact, it can be scary not to feel anything. Physically speaking, the inability to feel anything removes a quality of life and safety mechanisms from the person. One of the scariest things for a parent is having a child who cannot feel physical pain because that child is then likely to have ailments they will ignore-even as severe as burnt flesh or broken bones.

Speaking in the area of emotions, when one does not feel anything, it often drives individuals to extremes, such as seeking physical pain for a replacement or disengaging with life and succumbing to the numbness they feel. Either extreme decreases the quality of life, and the safety emotions provide. Life would be much more difficult without emotions.

Since emotions cannot be gotten rid of, it is important to learn how to manage them and when to trust them. Emotions being an innate part of us means they are there automatically, but as humans are not perfect, emotions can respond to stimuli incorrectly. Simply put, at times our emotions can act out of our control and fire without warning, and sometimes, without cause. This drives the need to learn how to manage them.

Putting emotions to the test

Learning how to manage our emotions means testing them. Taking emotions for face value can lead to trouble if there is no call for the emotion and/or the amount of emotion in the first place.

How does one know which emotions to test and which emotions to go along with? Start with the emotions that cause the most difficulty in relationships and/or life in general. Are there any emotions that cause strife between you and a loved one? Is this a repetitive problem? That’s where you should start.

Once you’ve established a target, you can question it by asking for evidence that both supports and refutes its validity. Arguably, you can feel that something is a big deal where evidence may not point to it being so. If you have big feelings about something and those feelings are driving behavior that results in repetitive conflict, it will not be easy to test these feelings.

The next question is to ask where your circle of control is. With an understanding of what you do and do not have control over, you can start to explore areas of support that will help you manage these emotions most appropriately.

Once awareness, understanding, and support are established, you can continue to manage your emotions through practice. In a perfect world, questioning our emotions would be unnecessary. Unfortunately, on this side of heaven, sin is at play in everything.

Sin makes things complicated

Emotions are normal, but in this world, emotions are laden with sin. Instead of leading us away from sin and toward God, they can lead us toward sin and away from God. Complicating matters even further are the influence of other sinners and the overwhelming brokenness of this world. The nature of sin at play in our emotions drives the desire of many to rid themselves of the emotions altogether.

Sin is a normal part of this broken world. It does not, however, mean that we are at the mercy of sin. We can overcome sin and move past its devastating effects with the help of the Holy Spirit. Moving past is not easy, just as the managing of emotions comes with much effort.

Normal anger can bring about enslaving habits of outrage and cruelty with devastating shame, brokenness, and remorse to follow. Moving past the devastating effects of sinful anger can mean seeking forgiveness, improving the management of the anger, as well as releasing shame.

Sadness commonly brings about the destruction of connections with those around you and/or with God. It can cause a habit of mind where you think less of yourself than what is true or produce a skewed view of God and His promises. The chains of sadness can make it difficult to hope. Moving past these effects of sinful sadness brings connection, the ability to hold on to truth, and breathes hope into all circumstances.

Fear, in all of its sinful nature, brings about the destruction of trust and decreases access to truth. Moving past these effects can look like restoring access to support, shining a light on truth, and building a firm foundation to stand on.

Fighting through normal emotions and all of the effects of sin that complicate them can be difficult. The most important part is that you do not do it alone, but with God, and if possible, with another person who can point you to God. This is the best way to approach managing your emotions.

Reach out to me or one of the other Christian counselors in our online directory today if you find yourself needing support in managing your emotions and all of the thoughts and behaviors that they bring out.

Photos:
“Memory Loss”, Courtesy of Tumisu, Pixabay.com, CC0 License; “World Clock”, Courtesy of PIRO4D, Pixabay.com, CC0 License; “Heart”, Courtesy of TheDigitalArtist, Pixabay.com, CC0 License; “Reflection”, Courtesy of Mikitia Yo, Unsplash.com, CC0 License

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